Marriage?

What makes somebody ‘marriage material?’ And do people get married for the right reasons? and what are the right reasons?! Is it because the timing was right for him/her/you? Did a certain someone fill all the qualities you were after? Did you get fed up of looking for anything else? Did you marry due to pressure? Or was it plain and simple…. Out of love?

I haven’t got a clue about marriage. For some reason it terrifies me, but that may be because i haven’t witnessed many successful ones, which is sad. It just worries me that it could fail, and i’ll be left heartbroken and divorce is obviously very messy!!

A lot of celebrities and people these days think nothing of getting married like 4 times. E.g. Elizabeth Taylor, JLO, Katie Price etc. A part of me thinks ‘good on them’, they were obviously head over heels in love, put their all into it and made a public commitment.

Another part of me thinks, how can they get married that many times? Surely there’s a pattern here. They’re either a) not getting to know the person properly b) rushing it for whatever reason c) aren’t afraid of divorce as they’re extremely wealthy as it is d) didn’t work hard enough for it to last.

In my moms day, divorce wasn’t really an option. Well it was, but was frowned upon. You had to put in the hard work and effort and make that marriage last! In terms of infidelity, violence etc then i understand that these things are hard to work at, and so divorce is probably the right thing to do. In other cases though, are people in this Generation taking marriage seriously?

Why do people get married? I always used to say, out of love. To show God and those around you how much this person means to you. And i still believe that should be the reason.

Sadly, some people are forced to marry others for religious matters without even a say, some marry due to convenience, the wealth factor which is wrong. and some even marry just to get married!

What makes someone marriage material though? I once read a few sentences in a Fiction book which kind of make sense, ‘everyone knew that crazy passion or great love affairs cooled after the first few months, maybe a year. What mattered was finding someone who would be a good partner for the long haul. Who would stay by your side, be a good husband, a good father.’

I do partly agree with it! But in all fairness, i’ve dated men with the above excellent qualities but bored me to death, then dated men fun and exciting, that had NONE of those qualities!

So what’s a girl to do? Marry the man that will look after her and love her yet never excite her? Or the man that will excite and bring fun in her life but she never quite knows if he loves her as much as the former man? Orrr is there a man in between that is both the above, fun AND brings love, trust and security? Girls, share your thoughts…

Has anybody met somebody with all the qualities that they were looking for? Or again, in my other blog, is there no such thing? No perfect person, no ‘the one’ and you get the good with the bad? :/ πŸ˜•

To those with happy marriages and those with long marriages, congratulations! 🍸🍸 and please do us all a bloody favour and share the secret!!! 😁😁

Any comments, muchly appreciated!

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5 Responses to Marriage?

  1. Bryan says:

    My wife and I have been married for over three years and we are both in our thirty’s and this is our first marriage. We have had our share of arguments and hurts, health scares, and depression. (If you are interested, I wrote her a post on my blog.) At the beginning we both said divorce was not an option, and I am so glad we made that decision. Divorce is an easy way out. Don’t misunderstand me if one partner is being abused then he or she needs to get out of that relationship or marriage. But for us we are stronger because we have worked through our differences. She is the one I have chose to spend the rest of my life with; I am going to do everything I can to make sure our relationship stays good.

    I am not sure if I have answered any of your questions but my quick story is I wasn’t sure I would ever get married. I was 29 when I met my wife-to-be. I was scared about marriage, scared about commitment, etc. But I fell in love. It all was still scary but love has a way of changing things. If I may ask, is there anything underlying your fear of marriage?

    • Thank you Bryan! And congratulations (: It’s so nice to hear about marriages that are working. And yes, i guess everyone has their fair share of tough times, but well done to both of you for sticking through those times. I think marriage just makes me feel a little uneasy incase it don’t last, i’ve always wanted to hopefully get married one day. I think i haven’t witnessed many successful marriages which is why i defo have cold feet! Thank you for taking the time to respond, i will have a look at your blog, and all the best to you and your wife! Don’t let anything get in the way (: x

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