The Most Important Relationship Of All.

The most important relationship of all is the one that you have with yourself. If you don’t love yourself, then who will? Sometimes you need to take a step back, forget about everyone else, and concentrate on just ‘you.’

You need to enjoy your own company before you even begin to share your time with anybody else.

If you have low self esteem or a negative attitude toward life, it isn’t fair to drag another person into that deep black hole with you. You need to recognise the problem is within yourself, your mind, and that only you can do something about it.

Whether it’s seeking professional help, or helping yourself, it has to be done. You may need to free your mind of stress. Practise yoga, meditate, exercise, do things that make you laugh such as watching a comedy, or socialising with friends. If you ignore certain feelings, then they may get worse.

If a whole day to yourself seems daunting, then try a couple of hours to begin with. Do activities that will keep your mind busy. If you need confidence building, then perhaps buy some new make-up, colour your hair, have a pamper day at home, or maybe attend confidence building classes, group activities where you socialise with new people, i.e. dancing lessons, cooking lessons, the gym, a book club etc.

If you’re single, don’t feel that in order to be happy that you need a boyfriend as this isn’t true. Enjoy your single status whilst you can.

Read positive articles, seek inspiration in someone that you admire.

Being single is a time to truly focus on yourself. Achieve your goals, do something new that you have always wanted to do. Be selfish and think of number one.

If you’re in a relationship, then communicate with your partner. A problem shared is a problem halved. Really enjoy quality time together, but make sure that you still have time with ‘you.’

If you are happy, then you will attract happy and positive outcomes.

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Pass Along Questionnaire.

I was tagged by Samantha Priestley to answer the following questions to post on my blog, and tag another three authors/bloggers, so below are my answers, and Samantha’s answers on her blog:

http://sampriestley.tumblr.com/

Check out this blog also: here: – http://1974haze.blogspot.co.uk/2014/05/my-cultural-life.html

1. Favourite cliche: All good things come to those who wait. I truly believe this. Patience is a virtue!

 2. Poem known by heart: I don’t know any, which is quite bad Although, I can write poetry 🙂

3.  Guilty pleasure: Chocolate, cakes, reality TV shows, make-up, clothes…… The reason these pleasures make me feel guilty afterwards is because I have to have an excessive amount! If I open a packet of biscuits, I almost finish the pack, and make-up I have drawers full, and forever buying more, and clothes (some of which I still have tags on or wear once :/ !! 

4. The first record you bought: I used to do a bit of mixing when I was about 18, I had some Vinyl decks, (now have CDJ’s) and the very first record I had, which I will ALWAYS remember is: Dreaming – Arrola (Beltik remix.) You can have a little listen here, VERY Ibiza, even then! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yi3RhBHBs5U&hd=1

The Spanish lyrics in English are: Let’s go play in the sun, everyday is a day for partying. 

5. The book that changed your life: The Secret/The Power/The Magic, all by Rhonda Byrne, How to Get Rich by Paul McKenna, What is Love, What is God. I love self-help and educational books. The Secret is on my bedside table, always. 

6. What’s your audition piece: I seriously can’t think of one! My mind has gone blank. 

7. Favourite film: I would be here forever if I listed all of my fave films. I LOVE watching films! Some of my faves, from the top of my head are Scarface, Goodfellas, Blow, The Great Gatsby (I cried!), Midnight Express (SO sad!), The Notebook, Pretty Woman, Dirty Dancing, Cruel Intentions, Terminator/s, Snatch, Fight Club, American Pie/s, Room 1408, The Shining, Gladiator (I cried!) Troy, Gangs Of New York, Shutter Island, Chopper, Bronson, Training Day…. There’s so many!

If you need a good film recommendation, check out my film page on https://authorsophia.wordpress.com/film-recommendations/

8. Favourite villain: Ooh. This is a good one. I was drawn to Heath Ledger as the Joker in The Dark Knight. Arnie in Terminator 1, and Joaquin Phoenix in Gladiator. They all played these parts brilliantly! 

9. Who would you like to play you in the film of your life: When I was blonde, I would have said Cameron Diaz, as I have so many ditzy bimbo moments! Now I’m brunette, maybe Sarah Jessica Parker, or Jennifer Aniston. Both strong characters, but vulnerable at the same time. I admire all of these actresses. 

10. Favourite hour of the day: The afternoon! About 12, sunbathing time! 😀

11. Do you have any irrational fears: Spiders! I am absolutely terrified of them! 

12. Recurrent dream: I don’t think I have reoccurring dreams, they usually differ each time. I really believe that your dreams mean something though. I had a weird dream once, I looked up the meaning, and it was exactly what I was going through in my life at that time. Freaky! 

13. What’s worth fighting for: Love, freedom, peace, family. 

14.   Signature dance: Harlem Shake. Only kidding! Although me and my sisters do have a signature song: Satisfaction! That brings back memories of a great holiday in Greece! So whenever that comes on, we have our dance. 

15. What’s your USP: I think I’m pretty good at giving advice. My friends always come to me if they need advice on anything. I’m also good at standing my ground, if it’s a debate, or I know I’m right, I will not back down! 

16. Money or sex. Money. You can attract/buy sex if you have money. LOL! Not like I would, though :p

17.  Apollo vs Dionysus: Apollo, the God of music, poetry, and prophecy. 

18. Dylan or Hendrix: Hendrix. 

19.  James Dean or James Steward: James Dean. 

20. Optimist or pessimist: Optimist, always!

21.  Minimalist or maximist: Somewhere inbetween. 

22.Grace Kelly or Grace Jones: Grace Kelly.

23. Lennon or McCartney: Lennon.

24.What’s your fancy dress: I love fancy dress, a good excuse to really dress up. Have been an American cop, a sexy secretary, sailor,  ‘moulin rouge/burlesque’ costumes, 1940’s Pinup girl, Katy Perry (California girls video) and more. 

Couple of oldschool pics!

DJS

MR

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TOP TIPS from authors.

I like to pick authors brains about their top tips. Now and then I post questions on Facebook for authors and readers feedback on writing and books. Thanks everyone for their feedback!

I have to put my favourite quote first, as I really believe this! If you’re a writer, novels should not only be read for enjoyment purposes, but also as research. Look at the authors writing style, the layout, the way they describe things etc. If you treat writing as studying also, then you are sure to learn a lot. Some of my favourite authors have really inspired me, and whichever genre I am writing at the time, I like to read that genre also.

I also strongly believe in seeking second opinions, not from those closest to you either, as they will tell you your novel is great! Try and find beta readers, people not known to you for their honest thoughts. You would be surprised at the things people pick up on that you missed, or their own opinions on plot, characters, setting etc. Of course you like your characters, but who is to say others will warm to them? It’s the best thing you can do, along with getting your manuscript professionally edited.

If you want to be a writer, you must do two things above all others, read a lot and write a lot – Stephen King.

Only write for one reason – because you love doing it. Everything else is a gamble but if it pays off, it’s a fantastic bonus! – Sheila Norton.

Don’t be afraid to write with emotion and intensity. If you don’t, the characters you are trying to develop will remain lifeless stick figures on a page instead of evolving into real people – Ronald Paxton.

For me, it’s having deadlines, but being flexible. I give myself three months to write the first draft. Then, I go through the entire process that follows, beta readers, hire an editor, etc. It’s taken me a long time to accept that hitting the ‘publish’ button is not my main goal as a writer, is writing a book that I am completely proud of, no matter how long it takes to get there – AV Scott.

If you are writing sex scenes or anything controversial don’t let the thought of your family and friends reading it (eventually) edit it for you. Just write it as you want to! – Sara Cawthorne.

My best tip is: Stop procrastinating that knicker drawer doesn’t need alphabetising – sit on your ass and write! – Sara Cawthorne.

Write with passion and love, be honest and if it will improve the work, incorporate your own life experiences into fiction. Think outside the box and be open to ideas that may come from anywhere – Ian Lowell.

Stole this one from Kirsty Greenwood who in turn stole it from somewhere else but: if you want to nice up your characters make them do something LOVELY on first meeting them. Simple but effective – Rosie Blake.

“Head Hopping! This is a term when you are telling the story from one characters POV and then you “hop” into the other characters head and suddenly you are telling the story from their POV. Keep in your first characters head. Imagine that you can only see and tell things that they can see and know. Don’t have them know stuff they can’t see or know about. Like what another character is thinking! If they are experiencing something, write it as they experience it. They won’t know what they look like without looking in a mirror, so if they get embarrassed they’ll only know their face has gone red if they look in the mirror or someone tells them. What they will know is that their face feels hot.” – Teresa Whaley.

If you have any TOP TIPS, please feel free to let me know via Facebook – Sophia Valentine Author.

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10 Great Quotations from Writers about Work

10 Great Quotations from Writers about Work.

‘Hard work is simply the refuge of people who have nothing whatever to do.’ – Oscar Wilde

‘I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.’ – Charles Lamb

‘Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.’ – Samuel Beckett

‘Work is more fun than fun.’ – Noel Coward

‘The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up and does not stop until you get into theoffice.’ – Robert Frost

‘I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.’ – Jerome K. Jerome

‘Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn’t the work he is supposed to be doing at that moment.’ – Robert Benchley

‘I don’t do anything. Not one single thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don’t even do that any more.’ – Dorothy Parker

‘I work until beer o’clock.’ – Stephen King

‘When I was a young man I observed that nine out of every ten things I did were failures. So I did ten times more work.’ – George Bernard Shaw

Reblogged by: interestingliterature.com

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Why do we care?

Why do we care so much about what other people think of us? It’s such a shame that we live in a judgemental society. People judge others based on: appearance, career, life decisions etc. And sometimes we find ourselves worrying about it. Worrying about what others may think of us. And sometimes we avoid certain situations, or change our mind on things due to this. But why?

If I listened to all the critical things that were said to me, and other peoples opinions, I wouldn’t be where I am today. There have been many times when I have allowed other people to manipulate me, or made me see things ‘their way’ for their own benefit. Isn’t it funny how most people are quick to notice and comment on your failures and setbacks, however when it comes to any success, praise is few and far between.

Why can’t people just be happy for one another? Support one another, even if they don’t necessarily agree with it. We’re all dealing with some sort of struggle in this life, whether it be finanical, relationship, illness, a loss etc without people adding salt to the wound. We should all allow others to lead their lives how they want to, providing they’re not hurting anybody.

You either get the nosey neighbour, a gossiping friend, two-faced people that just can’t help themselves, the preacher, or if you’re lucky, all of them!

But who are they to judge? They are not perfect. Nobody is. Who says that their way of living is the right one? Nobody is more superior than anyone else, (it doesn’t matter how much money you’ve got! Tangible items mean sweet F all.) When we die, our graves look the same! No one is more important than another! We just chose different paths in life, that’s all! So before you judge somebody also, remember that!

Do what YOU want, and what makes you happy. Stop looking for approval from others. Trust yourself, and go with what you believe.

We will never be able to please everyone, and keep everyone happy, so there’s no point beating yourself up about it.

You only get one life. So enjoy it….

And stop caring what other people think!

🙂

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It’s okay to not know, give it all a go….

‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’

It’s the question we are all asked. Some people know what they want to be. They have a passion for a particular job, and this never changes as they get older. Fireman, policeman, vet, teacher, florist. The majority of them go on to work in these professions, and are extremely happy in their jobs.

BUT…..

What if you don’t know what you want to be? What if you study for years for a particular job, only to find out that it’s not quite what you wanted after all? Is all hope lost. No, it most definitely isn’t!

We all have to test the water at some point, so treat each bad job as ‘experience.’ We won’t know what we like and what job we suit in, if we don’t try several out first. Never give up. If you’re happy in your job, great. If you’re not, change it! It’s never too late. Career changes happen at all ages, whether it’s leaving a firm for a slightly better one, higher pay, nicer colleagues/boss, or whether it’s a new job entirely, a completely different path, take the risk. You don’t want to be slumped over your desk in 10 years time wishing you’d made the plunge and risked it. There’s no time like the present.

If it’s proving difficult to get a new job in the field that you desire, (experience, qualifications, blah blah), then perhaps try going for Intern jobs/work experience. Get your foot on the ladder, even if it’s unpaid work at first. You have to start somewhere! There’s nothing wrong with starting off small, with a job you cannot stand for a few weeks/months to get those qualifications on your CV!

Before fame, take these celebrities below for example:-

Harry Styles used to work in a bakery before his 1D days, Beyonce swept hair from her mother’s salon, Lady Gaga was a waitress, Carrie Underwood was a cashier at a petrol station, Madonna was a Dunkin Doughnuts cashier, Rachel McAdams worked at McDonald’s, Megan Fox worked in a smoothie shop dressed as a banana, Johnny Depp made ends meet by selling ballpoint pens!

In my own experience, I left school with my GCSE’s, studied Law at college for five years, then worked in a Solicitors Firm for another five years. Two as a Legal Secretary, and three as a trainee Legal Executive, handling clients cases, preparing and submitting court papers for deadlines, attending court, interviewing possible fraudulent clients etc. However, after a while,  a lot of people who worked at my firm felt unappreciated, weren’t happy with pay not reflecting their hard working skills, and felt that there was no room for further development. After a while, I, myself, decided to quit.

When I was younger, I had always dreamed of becoming a teacher or a writer. So, not only did I quit my job, but I left the country too. I had always fancied taking a gap year out, or to try working abroad for a while, get a taste of different culture, a substitute lifestyle if you will. In May 2012 I moved to the beautiful Balearics, Ibiza! Guess what? I’m still here now!

Yes, it’s scary. I worried for months whether I had given up on a good career, whether I wasted 5 years studying for nothing and if I’d made the right choice. At the moment, I cannot speak fluent Spanish, yet! I have no job, a boyfriend, but not a big amount of friends like I was used to in England, but so what? I’m back writing, the thing that has always been my number one passion, I’m learning another language, and I’m seeking work.

There’s a quote which I will leave you with, in respect of your life, career, relationships, etc….

‘It’s better to regret the things you do, than the things you didn’t do!’

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Tips On Working Abroad

OK, if you have ever contemplated asking your boss for five months sabbatical leave to travel, actually quit your job (like me), or just want out,to seek a substitute lifestyle, explore the world, or live somewhere nice and HOT for a while, look no further than here.

There is no age limit on travelling, we only get one life. And remember:

‘It’s better to regret the things you did do, than the things you didn’t do!’

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1. Save, save, save! The more money that you have, the better position you will be in. You will need to pay for your flights, book a hostal/hotel straight away, and buy food and drinks. Not to mention, paying rent/deposit once you’ve found an apartment.
2. Ask your boss to consider granting you sabbatical leave. Write a letter/email stating as much as you really love your job, you feel that you have reached a point in your life where you’d like to do a bit of travelling, and why you would like to return to your job. If it’s refused, quitting is the only other option. I chose not to let employment hold me back, no matter how long i had attended College studying, and even got a promotion.
3. Do your research! Check if there are FB group pages, forum’s etc to start talking to other people wishing to do the same. Look for possible roommates. You can also look for apartments online, email the landlord, however i’d be careful about paying a deposit before you’re there. (Try to arrange meeting in person once you’ve landed, and always get a receipt.)
4. Buy a book and try to learn the language! Well, some of the basics. This will open several doors for you.
5. When you land, attend bars/cafes/events etc to meet friends/roommates. Again, don’t rush this! Be wise! You don’t want to end up living with someone you can barely stand, or may steal from the apartment, or being a lot of people back.
6. Ask the staff in bars/cafes/internet shops if they know of any recruitment days/where to apply for jobs/apartments. Many will have noticeboards advertising work/jobs.
7. Ensure that you have at least fifteen copies of your CV with your mobile number stated. A photograph at the top may also help. Hand them out everywhere!
8. Spend wisely! Don’t blow your savings/wages on sightseeing/shopping/partying. You’re there for five months or more, and could lose your job at any minute. Look for cheap supermarkets to save money, shop there for food and drinks.
9. If you’re seeking work in Spain, attend the Police Station and ask for a form to apply for an NIE number. (Equivalent of a National Insurance number.) You will receive an appointment date to return with completed form/passport, whereby it will be stamped. You attend the bank, paying something like 11e. Back at the Police Station, you will then receive your NIE card, which lasts forever. MOST jobs require you to have an NIE number, however, some may employ you without.
10. Shop around. Look for workers drink discounts/workers bands entitling you to cheaper drinks/club entrance. Make friends that can get you on the guest list for certain clubs. Sometimes, it’s not what you know, it’s who you know.
11. Be careful! You’re in a Foreign Country. Stick with your friends, don’t get in a state whereby something bad could happen to you. Don’t hang round with the wrong crowd, and don’t get in illegal taxi’s!

Most of all, go and have the time of your life!

Any questions, please comment. I’m more than happy to help.

I wanted a change, wanted to try something new, live somewhere hot, so quit my job to work abroad. Had hoped to do a Season in Ibiza, work and save and visit Thailand and Australia. However, i’ve never left Ibiza and i’m still here! I had the best season ever! Traveling and exploring can happen at any age! And it’s not only for those with nothing going for them back at home. I worked in a Solicitors as a Trainee Legal Executive, had my own Secretary, was driving, had rented a house for a couple of years, had a good social life and friends.

I was bored. I wanted a change. I went for it. It’s as simple as that.

I’m pleased to say that i have visited: France, Greece, Italy, Mallorca, Tenerife, Magaluf, Ibiza, Romania, and soon to be, Barcelona.

I hope to check out Formentera, Madrid and America in the future! (:

😁💋

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PDA’S? Good Or Bad?

Public displays of affection. PDA’S. In my personal opinion, pda’s are sooo annoying!

Examples! Couples eating one another’s faces off at the busstop, getting all touchy feely in a restaurant/cinema. I’m sorry but there’s a time and a place!

I’ve had some (ex) friends, literally slobber all over a guy in my presence. Lay all over him kissing, flirting, whispering in his ear, hands everywhere. Get a room! I find it so rude. The person isn’t going anywhere, so why can’t it wait? I wouldn’t want any of my friends to feel like gooseberries or make them feel awkward around me and my other half.

Don’t get me wrong, holding hands, a kiss here and there is fine. When old people do it, it’s especially cute.

But why would you want to publicly show the World that you want to ravage someone as soon as you get indoors? Nobody cares if you have sexual chemistry, keep it to yourself lol. What’s particularly annoying is when it’s obvious they’re doing it on purpose, trying to prove something. If your relationship is that good, then you don’t need to broadcast it, do you?

Like Sharon Osbourne stated, ‘it was unbelievably bad. The antics behind the screen had gone up a gear with her [Danni] sticking her tongue in Simon’s ear and giggling like a bloody teenager as Louis Walsh and me stood there like a couple of gooseberries.’

Are you a PDA committer or against it? Comments please! 😁

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Inspirational Quotes Collection

I love quotes, whether from the famous that have passed away or still with us, whether ordinary people, i find some very inspirational. I will continue to add quotes to this page when i come across them.

As mentioned before, the book The Secret by Rhonda Byrne has some good quotes and it is so uplifting.

If you know of any good quotes, please comment. Here are a list and some pictures of some:

Time is precious, waste it wisely.

The key to happiness lies with you!

Reality is a product of our dreams, decisions and actions.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. -Eleanor Roosevelt

You’ll never find the RIGHT person if you never let go of the WRONG one.

Let your dreams be bigger than your fears and your actions louder than your words ‪

Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.

Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen. -Michael Jordan

Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen. -Michael Jordan

Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. -Golda Meir

The only way to have a life is to commit to it like crazy. – Angelina Jolie

Don’t go through life, grow through life.

Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you. -Unknown

If you keep doing what you’ve always done, you’ll keep getting what you’ve always gotten.

No risk, no gain.

When you choose to forgive those who have hurt you, you take away their power.

The key to success is = ACTION

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Are bad boys going out of fashion?

Ok, why do many women like a bad boy? I understand that some women like excitement, unpredictability, fun etc.. But if you’re trying to tame a bad boy, accept a) the shit that goes with it b) the fact that he will be bad, i.e sometimes treating you bad & c) he will only change when he wants to, not when you want him to, & some cases it might be never.

Women grow up watching villains & kick ass hero’s! So, that’s what some women want & expect. If you like any of the following, then you’ve got the bad-boy-attraction-syndrome:

>Edward Norton, American History X
>Eminem
>Johnny Depp, Public Enemies
>Tom Hardy, Bronson
>Eric Banner, Chopper
>Ryan Phillippe, Cruel Intentions
>Jason Statham,
>Jonathan Rhys Meyers, The Tudors
>Joaquin Phoenix, We own the night

You may get the excitement but you’ll also get all the crap that comes with it such as broken promises, being stood up, feeling unwanted, being messed around etc,& you go back for more as you want what you can’t have & the perks of hopefully taming him one day. However they are bad for a reason, meaning selfish & only caring about themselves until they are ready to settle down. Some of them may never change even after you’ve got him, like being unfaithful. Don’t ever let a bad boy play with your emotions & make you chase him, that you’re grateful to have him, & that you should put up with his bad behaviour. Chemistry fades in the end the majority of the time, so if you’re not being treated right, forget them. Don’t be someones option when you can be someone’s priority! & don’t waste your time chasing bad boys when you could be spending time with good guys!

At least a good guy will treat you right. Respect, love & honesty beats excitement any day! Here are some good guys, cuz yes, bad boys ARE going out of fashion, (except in movies but that’s different!) lol!

>R-Patz, Twilight
>Ryan Gosling, The Notebook
>Michael Scofield, Prison Break,

And the same goes for men. Yes, you are just as bad. They grow up watching kick-ass chicks & porn & probably expect a bit of this too. The ultimate bad girls are as follows:
>Angelina Jolie
>Rhianna
>Christina Aguilera
>Jenna Jameson
>Megan Fox

P.S I’d love to hear opinions on this. & my list ISN’T finished so keep checking back 😁

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I’ve got hugs for you if you were born in the 80s!

“When i was young,” and “back in the day,” are sentences that leave my mouth which make me feel old! I’m only 28, (still 2years off 30 though ay?) :/ I don’t think we realise how fast the years go by. I realised i was old, i mean, older, when my nephews (14 & 15) began using slang in person & online, & i didn’t know what it meant! & i thought i was a cool aunt! 😥

So, rather than sit here & worry about hitting the big 30, i’m going to appreciate the fact that i was born in the 80’s! && grew up in the 90s! (: Back then, as a youngster i wasn’t glued to an Iphone/Blackberry worrying about relationships & my make-up like the kids today! Hell no! I was out playing & having fun. & i actually think that being born in the 80s & growing up in the 90s, we had it good!

Here are some things i remember, if you think of anything too, or something that you appreciated back in your day, (not necessarily the 80s) then feel free to share 😁

Barbie dolls. I loved barbies! I had it all! The pregnant barbie, the house that lit up & made noises, the horse & carriage, the convertible with trailer, the salon etc. I won’t lie, i played barbies til i was about 13! I had a younger sisters & some younger friends. Or perhaps i was clinging onto my youth even then lol!

Playing outside. We weren’t glued to technology like zombies, we were playing outdoors. I was only allowed in the Grove, but had fun on the bike, skateboards, rollerblades and just sitting on the graffiti cable box talking to my friends, not a care in the World!

TV. It was the best! I grew up watching Barbie, Inspector Gadget, The Power Rangers, Kenan & Kel, Clueless, Sunset Beach, Dawson’s Creek, Blind Date of an evening, and films starring Bruce Willis, Arnie, Van Damne, Styllone, Seagal etc. Then The Matrix came along when i was 15 & the way films were recorded & shot after that just changed forever (:

Music. C’mon! Eminem was out when i was about 15 & he was the best even then & still is now. We had Top Of The Pops which was great. I adored the Spice Girls, Five, N Sync, The Backstreet Boys. The boybands back then were much better! My bedroom wall was covered in posters and i collected all the Spice Girl cards! Lol! Recording from the radio, my fave songs, with a tape cassette which i then labelled. My first ever CD that came with my new stereo was the album from the film Grease.

Magazines. Smash Hits, J17, Bliss, Sugar where reading about the stars and their life as a teenager taught me a lot. The celebs weren’t like today, it was all sweet pop girl innocents like Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera and Jessica Simpson. I still prefer them over the likes of Rhianna and Jessie J, any day.

Technology. My first mobile was a Sony Ericsson brick, no camera, rubbish memory storage & a chunky aerial but i still loved it. Then about 16, i had a teeny weeny nokia which was in fashion & it was the cutest thing ever. The Internet had not long came out & it was chat room forums & Faceparty! Lol! My sister had a mini camcorder that recorded in black & white, we’d make drama films with our friends, acting. It was fun. Getting hair straighteners & hair dryers for Xmas & beauty products was the norm, not X Boxes, Playstation’s & expensive games. Although the Atari and Sega was popular. Then Playstation 1. My first games were Jurrassic Park & Crash Banidicoot.

Celebrities. They were more like stars when i was younger, you could only see them in Magazines! You had no chance of tweeting them on Twitter or whatnot. Nowadays pretty much anyone can be famous for the stupidest of things. Reality stars, pointless talentless people only famous for having a famous dad, or dating someone famous. It’s ridiculous. I would have loved to know what it was like to idolise the likes of Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, Audrey Hepburn and Sophia Loren. Inspirational and real stars!

Travel. A trip to Blackpool and Weston Super Mare or Rhyl with the girls was fun, now people as young as 18 are flying to Ibiza and Magaluf!

Books. I used to read Point Horror books, Stephen King, Mills&Boons, Virginia Andrews and Catherine Cookson in my teens. And my mom used to buy me Beatrix Potter books when i was really young.

Sweets. 1penny sweets, mix up’s of practically everything you wanted for £1 and my fave 10p crisps, Transformers, Space Raiders, Spicy Wheels etc.

Pogs & slammers! Anybody remember these?! 😮 & playing kerbs, when you stand opposite another on a kerb & bounce a ball off the kerb to get points.

So, there you have it. Times have definitely changed. So what if they have Justin Bieber and 1Direction, where i honestly cannot name one song! :s I may be reaching 30 soon, but would i change the year i was born? And not experience all that?! No chance.

Saying which, i wish i’d experienced the party scene in the 50s 60s & 70s, sort of like the Dancing Dancing tunes & the blues nights, i bet that was amazing! And did the men really hold open doors like the perfect gentlemen? :p 😁😝👏

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Marriage?

What makes somebody ‘marriage material?’ And do people get married for the right reasons? and what are the right reasons?! Is it because the timing was right for him/her/you? Did a certain someone fill all the qualities you were after? Did you get fed up of looking for anything else? Did you marry due to pressure? Or was it plain and simple…. Out of love?

I haven’t got a clue about marriage. For some reason it terrifies me, but that may be because i haven’t witnessed many successful ones, which is sad. It just worries me that it could fail, and i’ll be left heartbroken and divorce is obviously very messy!!

A lot of celebrities and people these days think nothing of getting married like 4 times. E.g. Elizabeth Taylor, JLO, Katie Price etc. A part of me thinks ‘good on them’, they were obviously head over heels in love, put their all into it and made a public commitment.

Another part of me thinks, how can they get married that many times? Surely there’s a pattern here. They’re either a) not getting to know the person properly b) rushing it for whatever reason c) aren’t afraid of divorce as they’re extremely wealthy as it is d) didn’t work hard enough for it to last.

In my moms day, divorce wasn’t really an option. Well it was, but was frowned upon. You had to put in the hard work and effort and make that marriage last! In terms of infidelity, violence etc then i understand that these things are hard to work at, and so divorce is probably the right thing to do. In other cases though, are people in this Generation taking marriage seriously?

Why do people get married? I always used to say, out of love. To show God and those around you how much this person means to you. And i still believe that should be the reason.

Sadly, some people are forced to marry others for religious matters without even a say, some marry due to convenience, the wealth factor which is wrong. and some even marry just to get married!

What makes someone marriage material though? I once read a few sentences in a Fiction book which kind of make sense, ‘everyone knew that crazy passion or great love affairs cooled after the first few months, maybe a year. What mattered was finding someone who would be a good partner for the long haul. Who would stay by your side, be a good husband, a good father.’

I do partly agree with it! But in all fairness, i’ve dated men with the above excellent qualities but bored me to death, then dated men fun and exciting, that had NONE of those qualities!

So what’s a girl to do? Marry the man that will look after her and love her yet never excite her? Or the man that will excite and bring fun in her life but she never quite knows if he loves her as much as the former man? Orrr is there a man in between that is both the above, fun AND brings love, trust and security? Girls, share your thoughts…

Has anybody met somebody with all the qualities that they were looking for? Or again, in my other blog, is there no such thing? No perfect person, no ‘the one’ and you get the good with the bad? :/ 😕

To those with happy marriages and those with long marriages, congratulations! 🍸🍸 and please do us all a bloody favour and share the secret!!! 😁😁

Any comments, muchly appreciated!

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The Secret

As promised, an inspiring blog (as will be each week.) For anybody that feels down in the dumps, stressed, unmotivated, fed up with life, it’s normal and we all feel like this at times. Even myself, whilst living it up in Ibiza with the sunshine, lovely beaches and the nightlife. Everybody has problems here and there and drama’s in their life. However, not all, but some things we do attract into our life. To change this, we must change our attitude and way of thinking.

I’d like to share some inspirational quotes again and some advice. There is nothing wrong with reading self help and self development books. I read Paul Mckenna – how to get rich which talks about how you are already rich, to look at your friends, your family, the possessions and life you have.

Also, Rhonda Byrne’s – The secret, the magic, the power which looks at law of attraction.

The book tells you that you can live your dreams and have anything that you want. You need to remember that your the driver of your life, you’re in control, only YOU can change it.

Count your blessings, not your problems, be thankful for what you do have, not down about what you don’t have, try to remain positive in life as ‘a positive attitude attract positive outcomes.’ So do positive people. If you have any negative people in your life that drain you, put you down, bring your nothing but stress, reconsider having them in your life, or keep them at arms life. Some people can be soul destroying!

A lucky charm is worth having. It might sound stupid but if you believe in something, it may work! It can be an object you take everywhere, a lucky keyring, a crystal rock, a pen… Anything! I have several lucky charms in the form of a bracelet, or earrings. The Hamsa Hand which is believed to ward off evil eyes and bring luck.

Also make a list of what you want to have in your life in categories such as: health, body, career, money, relationships, material things and work towards getting it! Theres no time like the present, and we can never get back yesterday!

I highly recommend reading self development / help books or maybe even a comedy book or film when you’re feeling crappy. Oh and never be ashamed to ask for help ever, forget about pride, ‘a problem shared is a problem halved’ and communication really is key. Below are some quotes for you all taken from the book, The Magic. 😁

When you arise in the morning, give thanks for the morning light, for your life and strength. Give thanks for your food and the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies within yourself – Tecumseh

The greatest wealth is health – Virgil

Gratitude is riches, complaint is poverty – Christian Hymnal

A thankful heart hath a continual feast – WJ Cameron

Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else, you are the one who gets burned – Gautama Buddha

People who wait for a magic wand fail to see that they ARE the magic wand – Thomas Leonard

Turn your wounds into wisdom – Oprah

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Ibiza:The Workers Lifestyle

THINKING OF BECOMING AN IBIZA WORKER? 

Add the Facebook page: Ibiza love for:-

Preparation advice and tips

Accomodation

Finding room-mates / meeting people

Obtaining an NIE number

Getting a job / different types of jobs

Recruitment days / places

The BEST places / parties / restaurants / to go to.

Ah what it’s like to be working a season in Ibiza. Let me advise you that although you are ‘slumming it’ as such and living on scarcely any money, it’s the best experience ever!! & Ibiza is amazing! As previously mentioned, there are over 40 breathtaking beaches, the famous sunset at Cafe Del Mar, the epic clubs, nightlife and music! And the other workers that you meet, of course! 😁

There are advantages and disadvantages everywhere you go in the world. Heres a little summary of what life is like for the majority of Ibiza workers.

We lived on noodles, bread, alioli, pasta, bacon, eggs, beans etc almost every day! Cuz it was the cheapest food in the shops, quick to cook & the restaurants were too expensive! Yes, we treated ourselves once a week (maybe less) and ate out, but the diet was pretty poor.

Lack of sleep. Some people lived in workers blocks which were complete party pads! Although a lot of people rented apartments in the quiet streets, a bit out the way from all the commotion. The pro of a workers block is the parties that happen, the con is the lack of sleep! Es Pon was a popular block in San Antonio however it’s now closed. Es Vedra & Las Pyramides are worker’s blocks also in San An, both with a swimming pool 👍

More pros of being an Ibiza worker are the discounts and freebies. Last year i had a Together band allowing me free entry to Amnesia every Tues, a Sankeys band & Cream band. Entrance to clubs can cost between 25e to 50e a ticket so having a band is amazing.

This year I have a band granting me access to Ushuaia every Saturday, and on selected days entry to Privilege, Es Paradis, Santos Beach Club, Sankeys & discounts to Zoo Project, & Space. Awesome or what?!

The ‘Ibiza workers’ band sold for 3e & Linekers & whatever else bands also entitle you to prices off drinks, so overall they’re not bad either.& Burger King do a mini ‘workers meal’ for a reasonable price.

Also, if you have friends that work in clubs you can be put on the guest list to places, such as i have a friend at Ibiza Rocks and Ocean Beach Club, which is great! They do say it’s not what you know, it’s who you know :p

Things that suck about being a worker in Ibiza is no English TV, but lets be serious, nobody’s there to watch TV lol! No proper/strong internet connection, unless you find the right sim card for your mobile (Yoigo & Lebara are good), no decent crisps such as Walkers and no decent squash unless you walk to the British Supermarket in the Bay, these are rarely sold anywhere else. It sells a lot of English food such as pot noodles, waffles, marmite, yorkshire puddings, Cadburys chocolate, ribena! And theres a cafe in San An which does a Sunday roast, it’s called Freddies! MMM! 😁 & it plays only fools and horses on the TV so you feel right at home (:

Another bar on the Westend where you’ll feel at home is The Boozer, run by a cockney man called John. It really does feel like being in an ordinary pub in London.

You meet many people whilst in Ibiza. The escapists seeking a substitute lifestyle, those who have nothing to stay in the UK for or fancy a change, the party animals, those who fancy a life in the sun etc. I met so many different unique characters in 2012!

I had crazy room mates, non stop partying room mates, messy room mates to psycho room mates! It was definitely an experience to say the least. I stayed in small rubbish apartments where the shower leaked and i saw a cockroach at one time, but i also stayed in modern spacious new apartments too, one with a huge balcony with a stunning sunset view.

Jobs are long hours and not the best pay. Well, if its commission and you’re not exactly putting in enough effort. If its fixed pay, its usually quite decent depending on the job. I had many different jobs over the summer.

Workers take full advantage of their summer in Ibiza and do a lot more tanning, sleeping and partying than they would back at home. It doesn’t feel like reality if i’m honest, i was rarely ever on top of the news around the World, and sometimes i didn’t even know what day it was let alone date it was! This was purely because we didn’t need to know for it didn’t matter. As long as we knew what time to start work, all was fine.

The connection is great. The workers feel like one big family and get used to seeing one another on a daily/nightly basis. There’s a Workers party held every year. Its a fancy dress theme. The best dressed wins a prize and usually a spot in the Ibiza Sun paper. Most workers are creative and make their own costumes like i did. I went as Katy Perry in ‘California girls’ with blue hair (: 😁 Pic below.

Literally, anything can happen in Ibiza and theres always something going on, day or night. You can meet friends for life, enemies, have flings, meet someone special, secure a job, maybe fall in love and never return (like me).. ❤

Crazy trends catch on each year. Some brill fashions, however some horrendous ones! Check my other post regarding ‘Ibiza Fashions.’

So, here’s a few pictures of life in Ibiza for the workers: the apartments, the food, the club or workers discount bands, the workers blocks etc.

P.s It’s definitely an experience that’s for sure, and a good one!!

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Grass is greener syndrome

How many people end relationships, quit there job, move away for someone or something better? A lot, that’s what. We dwell over a substitute lifestyle wondering ‘what if’, wanting more to life and are left feeling unsatisfied with what we have.

Sometimes, we don’t realise that the image/fantasy we created in our mind could be very different from the reality of it. No matter who you’re with you will experience good times and bad times and arguments. Before you pack your partner in, think about what you’re truly looking for, as the key to happiness lies within yourself. A pro and con list works wonders.

This also applies to dreaming about a life elsewhere, perhaps abroad, or a different career path. Imagine yourself already there. No matter where we run away to in the World, there will always be problems, the bad and good times.

The grass can always appear greener, but they do say ‘the grass is greener where you water it!’ and ‘sometimes the grass will appear greener on the other side because it has been fertilised by bullshit.’

My own example comes from working in a Solicitors Firm as a Trainee Legal Executive with my very own Secretary. I enjoyed it and the pay wasn’t too bad. However, after studying Law for 5 years, then working within the Firm for another 5 years, i wasn’t truly content. I worried about my studies, hard work and efforts going to waste if i quit. Then i told myself this quote, which i always go by:

‘Its better to regret the things you did do, than the things you didn’t do.’

If i moved abroad, also me fantasising about sunshine, walks on the beach etc, i wouldn’t have much of a Career. I cant speak Spanish just yet. So, it was remain in the UK with my job, car, friends in the miserable depressing rain wanting more, or move away to no career, not many friends but be somewhere hotter, nicer and taking a risk with someone i liked. I chose the latter.

Some days I wonder where ill be in 10 years time and so on, but life’s too short to worry. I’ve now been back 6 months, have a couple of friends and on my way to learning Spanish.

So, write your pro and con list, put your all into your current relationship, job and life, count your blessings and if you’re really not happy, change it. ‘The key to happiness lies within yourself.’ ‘Do a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life.’ ‘Its better to regret the things you did do, than the things you didn’t do.’

I once read a book on what our purpose is in life, and it said, its to find happiness. So find it and don’t settle! ❤

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Happy endings….

I have watched Prison Break for 4 Seasons running. Well, I held off watching Season 4, purchased it on DVD and now watched it through to the end some couple years later. I followed cute-sweet Michael Scofield all the way through whilst he saved lives, done all he could and made the show as entertaining as ever! Having devoted my every Sunday night for months and months to watch, Michael died in the end! And I cried. I’m ashamed to admit that tears came out and i sobbed!

All I wanted was a happy ending for Michael! Well, as far as that goes, i still loved Prison Break and Wentworth Miller is a legend!

Now, I get why we just love happy endings! Romantic endings, endings where the couple find one another, or the hero saves the day, or the lost pet gets found. Life is bad enough as it is, so it cheers us up to see a happy ending and for it to work out for some, (fiction or not.)

So, all those Romance Writers out there, I salute you! Nothing better than a slushy read or film to cheer us up when we’re feeling crappy.

happy endings all the way !

Hasta luego mi amigos!

And now, I’m in the Airport, en route to England to visit my family so I’m a very happy chica. Meanwhile, in Ibiza, the Island is getting busier, the Clubs are filling up nicely and the weathers getting hotter! ✈

 

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The old films…

I can’t help but feel that the ‘old’ films were much better than the films today. Not all, but some. I know that we have better cameras, computers, equipment and technology today but wow, some of the old movies were bloody brilliant!

I love watching films. I was lucky enough to have a father that would lie in front of the fire watching all the action films and comedy films to make me enjoy them to this day.

I have friends that find sitting through a film boring and the cinema. I just don’t get it. I find it REAL entertainment.

Even though it was made in 1984, before i was born, Terminator will always be one of my faves. The storyline is amazing. I also have sooo many other favourites, which i’ll kindly recommend, cuz i’m nice like that, some old and some new 😁

Terminator 1 and 2
Universal Soldier
Die Hard
Hard to Kill
Pulp Fiction
Scarface
Goodfellas
Blow
Coming to America
Boomerang
Face Off
Lethal Weapon
Con Air
Commando
True Lies
Training Day
Chopper
Snatch
Fight Club
Shutter Island
Inception
The Matrix
&& soo many more but my list would be wayy too long,& may bore you 😕

Arnie, Van Damme, Al Pacino, Bruce Willis, Steven Seagal, Eddie Murphy, Ray Liotta, dolph Lundgren, Mel Gibson, John Travolta, Nicholas Cage, Johnny Depp, Sylvester Stallone, Denzel Washington, Samuel L, Jackie Chan, directors: Quentin Tarantino, James Cameron, Steven Spielberg, John Woo, Wes Craven, Guy Ritchie && more = legends!

Oh, and i also like the girly films such as Pretty Woman, Dirty Dancing, The Notebook, The girl Next Door and more 😘

Pleaseeeeee comment and recommend some good films if you know of any as i’m always seeking good ones.

I may have been young enough and i am happy that i was in a time where we had video cassettes and could record straight onto them even though they were quite bulky, but whyyyyy can’t i be old enough to have been born in the time when Dirty Dancing and Pretty Woman was shown on the big screen? I bet that was really romantic 😍

Well, it’s strange how time changes things. Never before was sex really talked about, now we have 50shades openly discussing bondage, old romantics are now ‘friends with benefits’ and real macho men that would fight, do martial arts and totally kick ass are now more Super-Hero with powers. Bring back the old films and type of stories, i say!!

I suppose the same goes for books. Whilst some youngsters wouldn’t appreciate the old classic movies, books (hopefully) will always be read no matter how old, the best writers of: Jane Austen, Charles Dickens, Oscar Wilde, William Shakespeare and my faves Catherine Cookson, Virginia Andrew and more.

I really wish i still had the Beatrix Potter books i had as a child 📚 #LovedThem

Well, enough about what i find entertaining as it probably isn’t entertaining for you… Lol.

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The Ugly Truth…

Okay, so i’ve just watched The Ugly Truth, great film Btw! Some parts defo do hit home. It does seem that some women (and men) today ARE obsessed with finding Mr or Mrs Right and that he /she does measure up to the ‘dreamboat’ that they have created in their heads. He/she must be attractive, ambitious, caring, fun, etc. Whilst i have nothing against a ‘list of qualities’ as such, do these women ever get all of their boxes ticked? Can a person really have it ALL?? Women grow up with their eyes fixed to Movies with the happy, romantic ending, and their heads in romantic novels and Mr Darcy’s. It’s always the man that saves the girl.

Do these slushy romances brainwash us? Why aren’t we learning to be independent first, even Anne Boleyn was taught how to joke, eat, walk and talk like a lady, but was this for herself? Or for the men? :s

Women wanting a hunky Knight in shining armour that can protect her, romance and satisfy her.

The same applies to men, some wanting a glamorous, beautiful woman (like the airbrushed celebs on TV) that can be a Chef in the kitchen and a pornstar in the bedroom. Do they ever find her?

It’s not a bad thing for people to be fussy, not settle for anything less and wait/ believe in the ‘right one’. With internet dating, friend hook-ups, the forwardness of ppl in Clubs/Bars/practically anywhere today, we have so many options that we think that special person will come along any day now. With people in love telling you that when you finally meet ‘the one’ you will just know. How will we know?!

I have never felt in any of my relationships that i couldn’t go a day living without them, not cuz i didn’t love them but the fact that i’m a strong person and even if i loved someone with all my heart, i’m realistic to things failing/ending, so have built up a protective barrier incase this happens to be optimistic and know that sometimes you can’t always be in control of everything.

What if there is no ‘the one’? The World is a massive place, surely we can click with many people that share the same interests, that we’re attracted to. Maybe we’re wasting our time sitting here waiting for Mr or Mrs Invisible? Does the idea of Romance like the movies being unrealistic scare us? Why can’t we handle the fact that ‘the one’ could basically be somebody that you meet, like, learn to accept their good AND bad qualities (cuz we all have them) and fall in love when you know them properly.

I, for one, do not believe in love at first sight crap. Lust, yes. How can you love somebody that you barely know? Some people are married for thirty years and still don’t properly know their other half, so i’d like somebody to prove me wrong on this.

We’re shown blissful happy couples all over the TV, magazines etc and know of some content couples personally. However, we don’t know what happens behind closed doors. Nobody will Facebook status how their relationship is going downhill, what they cannot stand about their partner or the flaws they have or arguments that take place. Some people put on a front to the World and sometimes to themselves.

Can we not accept that it’s ok to be truthful? Relationships AREN’T perfect. It has it’s ups and downs, it’s bickering, it’s dry spells, the smiles and the tears. And living with somebody can be the best, yet worst experience in the World. Two different personalities, two people brought up differently, some set in their ways sharing one place, with one person. Their annoying, bad habits come to light, sometimes their messiness, the fact that they don’t wake up looking ‘perfect’, and many other things you never knew, you will find out.

At a certain age, everybody wants stability and safety and someone to share their lives with. However, throw away the checklist, the ‘ideal person’ you have visions of and accept that a relationship can happen at any place, at any time and usually when you least expect it. Don’t shoot somebody down because they didn’t fit the criteria, give them a chance.

And don’t end a relationship because you feel the ‘grass is greener’ elsewhere and that ‘HER boyfriend treats her like a Queen’, you don’t REALLY know that. Relationships that are good take hard work, patience, compromise, adapting and accepting a person for who they are and good communication.

I asked some of my girlfriends what made the man they were married to, or had several children with ‘the one’. They replied that they didn’t know if there was any such thing. That they loved them and spending their lives with them was a risk that they were taking. They do say ‘no risk, no gain.’ :s

And my mother spent thirty odd years with my dad, who was the perfect gentleman at the start, who remained as her Mr Perfect for five of those years, then changed. So, even if we do think we have that person, they too, can change.

There might not be a Mr or Mrs Right, and when you settle down it might not be how you dreamt/envisaged or be romantic like the movies and books… But somebody out there deserves a chance, just like you do…..

If anybody believes in Mr or Mrs Right and that they have found him or her, please share your comments, as i would DESPERATELY like to know! And not some rose-tinted, exaggerated *puke in bucket* romance but the TRUTH, warts and all please….. (: Thanking you nicely.

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My Tv told me to F Off…

The TV has basically told me tonight that ‘enoughs enough and to F off to bed’. Okay, well if it could speak, that’s what it would’ve said! I’m sitting here all comfy in my PJs half watching/listening to the TV and half reading a book. After a good hour of enjoying the sound of the TV and becoming intrigued in the chapters of my book, it suddenly goes quiet. TOO quiet. So i look around and the TV is off! Miffed, (i don’t believe in Ghosts,well, i do a tiny bit) turn the TV back on. Half an hour later, i notice that the screen says something along the lines of ‘the TV will automatically shut off when not in use’. Sooo, does this mean i need to flick the volume every now and then to let my TV know that i am still in the room?! I mean, how does the TV know if my film has finished? Is this Auto Off meant for lazy people that can’t be arsed to switch their TV off when they leave the room, or for people that fall asleep in front of it? Well, i do neither of these things so my TV better stop stereotyping me as a lazy/fall-asleep person.

How funny Technology is today. I mean, my hair straighteners often switch themselves off after a while, they have an excuse. Sometimes i DO forget to switch them off and risk burning the house down.

Plus, it’s also scaring me. The music videos are playing with no sound, then loud bagpipes will come from the speakers making me jump out my skin! Think this channel has poor signal, i need to change it before i do start believing in ghosts.

Anyways, i just thought i’d share my little experience of tonight. Now, i’ll go back to half reading, half watching/listening to TV, and go to bed when I WANT, not when the TV wants me to.

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More emotional as we get older?

I have just screamed like a 4 year old girl having witnessed a spider in the bedroom and ran as fast as my legs could carry me out of there. I contemplated being brave and catching it with a glass but it was just tooo big! Well, not big, but scary looking. And i’m sitting here panicky and afraid to go to sleep in there thinking, ‘will i ever get over my fear of spiders?’

How did i once play in the dirt making mud pies not caring about these long-legged creatures?

Also, why is it now that i’m a couple years off 30, i’m crying at movies and even books?! This didn’t happen when i was in my late teens or early twenties. Also, scary movies have more of an impact on me now than then. And don’t even get me started on the Drama’s. Is it because i understand the movies more now and the possibilities of things happening in this cruel World being realistic whereas my once, innocent, rose tinted ways were unable to digest such things before?

I’m more afraid to walk alone now at night than when younger. Why is this? Surely we’re meant to get more stronger and more brave with age?

I dunno, :s 😐 Perhaps, it’s just ME thats the wimp!

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